Knowing and Loving Ourselves: No More Putting It Off ‘Cause We Have Work to Do

by | Mar 21, 2022 | Inner Wisdom

Happy Spring, y’all! Time for new beginnings! This week we’re diving into how to do just that and it’s a vulnerable subject.

Pro Tip: it’s time we deepen how we love and relate to ourselves, professional women and womxn. Why? Because from this place of love, wisdom, and knowing, the work we do in the future will be that much richer.

Admitting from one ambitious human to another, I’ve realized over the last five years or so how crucial it is to allow space for healing and nurturing. I was the queen of “I’ll do it later…” at one of the busiest points of my life. I did this again when doing a job that wasn’t aligned with my natural gifts, but I needed the money.

Point is, we can still be ambitious and driven. However, let’s also be ambitious and driven about our well-being. But why is that so hard sometimes? Oh, I know: schedules, demands, roles, preoccupation, looking at the past or worrying about the future… I could really go on and on from personal experience and I know that you’ve got your distractions, too.

So, now what? How do we make this shift?

Transform Your Focus to Transform Your Life

Maybe that headline should become a bumper sticker… And while it seems selfish—because we’ve been conditioned to be self-less—this is where the core concept lies.

As a matter of fact, here’s a quick, simple example. When I get rushed or hyperfocused on a project or task I forget to eat or “I’ll do it later.” Blood sugar goes down, the headache comes up, wooziness is there, and more. After feeling all of this, I get annoyed with myself and try to retroactively deal with the situation.

Now, focus can definitely be a good thing; but if it’s causing harm that’s not as great. Also, I’ve been recognizing why these “I’ll do it later” situations happen: I’m trying to do it all, be perfect, and keep a pace that (allegedly) gets shit done. Regardless, I know that breaks are warranted. In my jobs, I chatted with others about doing it. And we all know there’s literature and statistics about breaks…Here’s a quick summary.

It just finally clicked how much of our focus is consistently going outward vs. inward. Mine, too. If our outward work is all-consuming and we keep this up, our inner work gets pushed aside. Let’s get real about the feedback I’ve heard and what I’ve felt myself:

  • Wanting more out of life.
  • Feeling like there’s a better job or role out there that matches our strengths.
  • Wishing for our lives to be more comfortable.
  • Craving less stress and angst
  • Hoping to feel and live with more peace and joy.
  • Less agitation and annoyance with others.

These feelings have been cooking for my entire professional pathway since I was in college and after. But, some of these deep questions need deep work, and not that long ago I “couldn’t access it.” Honestly, I wasn’t giving it the attention it deserved. Now, I am, because the rat race didn’t work. Noted.

So, take the article and don’t just think about breaks in finite ways. Think about applying time, space, and energy, intentionally. Why? Because this will influence our future work and Our Big Picture.

Giving Permission for Our Work Helps Us Do Our Work

Now, I know that things aren’t always bunny rabbits and roses; some life chapters can be downright sluggish or low and slow. I give you props for just getting through the tough times and trying to refocus on how you can love on yourself in each moment.

Still, stepping back and remembering Our Big Picture resulted in my “rat race feeling” cracking. Now it doesn’t feel as heavy or as solid and I feel a little less stifled in how I operate.

If we can crack open what we’ve told ourselves for so long–that there’s no time or that our needs can take a back burner–we will open ourselves to “What if…opportunities. Balanced opportunities. Wisdom coming up and out. Direction with our natural gifts, and areas of improvement, aligning. Making an extensive impact.

Wellness. Creativity. Joy. Happiness. Space. Peace.

Honestly, these aren’t just marketing ploys or unattainable themes. Let’s integrate these into our lives. And from these, we will create a ripple effect in our residence, our community, and in other ways. For our highest, most expansive work to be done, we need to make time for such things in our own life.

Again, I’ll be the first to tell you that I struggle with this, but I definitely don’t want to be at the end of this lifetime and getting on the Regret Wagon… Wishing I had cared less about what others think and more about what I feel and know.

That’s why I wanted to share this week about taking time and allowing space for deepening the relationship with our Selves. It’s not always easy, especially when we can be on autopilot. But when we can create space, and do some of our healing work, the inner wisdom that we bring to the table is more powerful. How we express ourselves, how we release drama, and how we intentionally greet our purposes, matter.

In reality, and don’t hate me for saying it like this, but we “only” have decades of our work careers left. Yeah, some of you want to retire within the next 12 hours, but for many of us, we’ve got time to think about the impact we want to make. So, let’s make the most of it, first, by starting with us.

Marinate on this for the next few days and Happy Ostara and Spring to you, Beautiful People! If you’re looking for more direct updates on the FSW world and want more direct connection, check out the FSW Circle. Want more independent research? Hit up the FSW Quiz, and if you have any questions or comments, leave them below or contact me 1:1 this way. Have a beautiful week ahead!

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