Forging Ourselves: Sit with the Past for a Moment: Part 1 of 2

by | Jan 31, 2022 | Inner Wisdom

This week’s post is more about reflections than tactics, fellow women and womxn. Admittedly, I’ve been reflecting on how our past influences our future and what we do from here. And it seems like we get forged in many ways throughout our life and our careers. We can also forge ourselves through choice and making changes in our life, or we get forged by the unexpected twists and turns that we never saw coming. So, what have I been doing lately? I’ve been sitting more with my new friend, Past.

When you look back on your resume and past experiences, do you feel like you’ve been better prepared for what you’re doing now? Do you feel like you are an “expert” of your life and the work that you’re doing? Or do you feel like your life manual and work playbook still have unfinished chapters to fill?

Understandably, we’ve all gone through the trials of learning a new career, learning a new organization or entity, and sometimes we wonder, “What the hell we were thinking? The greener grass isn’t here. It’s not even green. Seems a little burnt or crispy, and there’s definitely bare spots over there.”

So, do we blame ourselves? Do we not trust the validity of our “career choices,” from that moment on? I have…

While it might seem simplistic, my remedy for the “WTH’s” is looking back at the distance I’ve walked and the mountains I’ve climbed. Sometimes we do get the outcome we’ve wanted along the journey and sometimes we don’t. Or, we get something less concrete and seemingly more confusing: a stage where we keep growing, but we’re not moving ahead just yet.

There’ve been multiple times lately where I’ve wondered how we–myself and everyone else in the world–are going to get through. But then I look back on my history, and our history, and I see a plethora of opportunities. And while we can’t fix what happened before, per se, we can keep learning and grow from it. We can look at our situation with truth(s) and heal from it, to do the best work we’re here to do in our life’s missions.

Notice I’m using missions in a plural form. What if, similar to soulmates, jobs, or experiences, we might have more than one mission? Sure, we might have one overarching reason why our soul landed here, but what if we can take the pressure off for one big ol’ Purpose and live each day with smaller, tangible missions? And even if we can’t sense them right now, what if our missions stem from how we’re forged? I’d like to think we try to learn from our old habits and patterns. Then from this place, we can reshape our new choices, new missions, and our developing agency. And this, my friends, is where our Soul and our strengths align.

Honestly, I’m not sure I’ve met anyone who has had the perfect career path. Maybe they’re out there…but for those of us who have had ups and downs in our professions and roles, I give us a ton of credit for just showing up every day. And I don’t mean just showing up for the 9-5 or what we’re trained to do. I mean showing up for ourselves and showing up for what’s possible. Yes, we have our low moments. But when we start to break out of our boxes and believe we have more to offer, because of what we’ve experienced, that’s freeing. And, yes, freaky.

This week’s post is just simple, recent reflections. We all go through stages of rest, dormancy, and expansion..and I bet that every single one of us—myself included—struggle with past shadows or regrets, and we don’t want to keep regretting.

So what do we do about this? Just dive into the next job? Go take on a role that doesn’t exactly suit us or our strengths? Maybe… Or maybe we check-in with where we came from, and how we were forged along the way. Yes, as we sit with our Past Selves, we can even reflect on the coffee or tea stains left on our hearts or in our heads. After that, we can understand how we want to show up today. And tomorrow. And then the next day…

Come back to FSW next week for the second part of this reflection series. Until then, here’s some FSW resources to ponder over and check out: the FSW Circle, an FSW Quiz, and more Blog memos exploring a ton of topics. Have a beautiful week ahead!

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